Success is counted sweetest by those who Lazy Saturday

(Editor’s note: My father and I went to New York City to see a Mets game in the fall.  While there, we toured a submarine.  It was his idea.  I am a vegetarian and, obviously, a pacifist.  I took pictures of  everything on the sub that was circular.  The picture above ties in with today’s theme of randomness.  Does establishing a theme of randomness this early in the post diminish its inherent randomness?  Mrs. Citizen says “yes.”  Shit.)

Let’s start off today with some cold, harsh truths:  (1) There is no order to the universe.  (1a) Entropy reigns.  (2) We’re ill-equipped to deal with purely random occurences.  (2a) Subsequence, dear friends, does not equal consequence.  (3) In the immortal words of Forrest Gump, “shit happens.” (To be honest, that’s about the third best quote from my dude, but the top two: “I think I ruined your roomate’s bathrobe” and “That’s my boat,” really did not apply in this conversation.)  Who gives a shit on a Saturday morning about this Drunkard’s Walk posturing?  Hopefully, you do.  If not, download the tracks you want and then go back to shearing sheep or whatever the hell it is you do for a living.

I’ve been trying to put Lazy Saturday in a box lately, adhering to some sort of formula that (allegedly) offered “readability” and “coherence.”  Shit on that.  Today, you get the full bore of random occurrences that strike me as intriguing.  You get a cover, you get some hippie music, you get some stuff that just straight rocks.  I’ll be back next week with the material that you expect to coax you into the weekend (some cutting edge-ish new stuff (a la The Blood Red Dancers and Young Buffalo), some live stuff that makes me grin (a la Morphine and P-Funk) and some stuff that I’ve pulled out of the zeitgeist (a la everything else you’ve ever seen in this forum)).  Today, however, pure chaos.  Live it, taste it, love it.

First:  the best Pink Floyd cover from a regional act you are ever going to hear.  If you saw The Shantee play “Fearless” once, you wanted to see it more than pretty much anything else in the catalog.  It trumped all other covers, up to and including “Ziggy Stardust.”  You were there.  You know I’m right.

“Fearless” – The Shantee

Next: I’ve listened to “Wife Soup” exactly one thousand two hundred and thirty four times.  Start your own journey with the definitive live version now.

“Wife Soup” – Umphrey’s McGee

Last: Who doesn’t want to close out with some Rock Music (note the capitals and italics)?  If you said “no,” get the fuck off my blog.  (Aside: While we’re talking about people who should get the fuck off my blog: If you’re Ciaran Brandywell (obviously a nom de bolg, by the way, which makes you a pussy as well as an idiot) , allow me to offer the following retort: a.) There’s no other place to derive the Shaky Hands than from The Who.  Do you think they’re a band of meth heads or some shit?  Seriously.  Look up the word “allusion” and get back to me.  b.) “Earnest” describes a firm and humorless conviction in one’s belief, not some sort of douchey “spiritualism.”  And.  It in no way connotes talent.  I know that Sir George was a way more talented cat than anybody in The Shaky Hands.  That has little to do with their ability to adhere to an idea.  c.) Analyzing is my job.  You’re the asshole reading my analysis and then commenting on it (poorly).  Keep reading and, in the meantime, as usual, fuck yourself.  Also, if anybody wants to pay me to teach them how to retort to the sweaty masses, drop me an e-mail.)

“Honey” – Mogwai